SmallTalk

Should you give up certain things in the bid to quit smoking?

This post came about after seeing someone’s tweet about giving up their morning coffee because of the association with having a cigarette.  Looking at my particular case (and I’m sure that the below will apply to an awful lot of smokers/ex smokers) if giving up anything that has a strong association with cigarettes was a ‘must’, or even beneficial for being able to quit, then realistically I’d have had to also forgo the following:

1/ Hanging around with Friends that smoke:  total bull, as I also smoked when I was hanging around with friends that didn’t smoke!  The outcome would be that I’d have had to avoid going out and spending time with any of my friends!  Pubs, clubs, bars and restaurants are all smoke-free and therefore ex-smoker-friendly now, so there really is no excuse, and when would  you feel safe? A months time, a years time, never?

2/ That first cup of coffee in the morning – lets face it, if I woke up and had an orange juice I’d still have had that cigarette.  I love coffee, it perks me up – the outcome of losing out on the caffeine is that I’d fall asleep at work!

3/ Cigarette after food:  technically you give this up when you quit smoking, but if I was to try and avoid the hypocrisy, what should I have done? Stop eating? – lets face it, there’s always an ‘after food’ scenario, lunch, dinner, breakfast – even a chocolate biccie, but I digress…

4/ Smoking in the car: – going along with the ‘coffee’ train of thought, I must, of course, associate driving with cigarettes – how long would it take to cycle the 7miles to work? Heaven’s, maybe I should have avoided getting in a car altogether…

Realistically, if you gave up everything you did which had an association with cigarettes in order to quit, then you’d have to give up a hell of a lot more than you think, and actually more than you would realistically be able to.  Why force yourself to give up the things you love, when you can continue with things that are necessary without a second thought?

The sooner you go out and just do the things you love without cigarettes, the sooner you can enjoy the things you love without cigarettes.

I felt more than a little frazzled.  I’d expected this, it’d happened before all those years ago. 

I met someone really nice, got on really well and the best part of the deal was that they didn’t smoke!  I got chatting to them, and after a while I was introduced to their mother.  Things were going great as I got on well with the mother too… but she smoked, and before too long I had a cigarette in my hand again.  I felt really, really bad.  I felt the horrible nicotine taste in my mouth,  feeling guilt ridden that I’d gone so long without a cigarette and now I’d ruined it all.  I couldn’t undo what I’d done, I hadn’t even remembered lighting the cigarette. 

I still felt like that when I woke up. 

And boy did I wake up feeling grumpy!  Honestly, I felt almost as bad as if I had actually smoked that cigarette, however,  it didn’t take me long to realise that I’d had a dream similar to this when I’d quit before and Allen Carr’s EasyWay book actually mentioned that this was a normal thing for many ex-smokers.  Looking back it actually felt good that even in my dream the cigarette tasted absolutely horrible – and that was my subconscious talking!

So rather than thinking of this as a bad thing, I’ve accepted this as part of the experience of quitting smoking, and I will, in the words of the Beautiful South, just “carry on regardless”

The Perpetual Quitter.

Well, It has been 22 days since my final cigarette (I sound like confessing there don’t I!), and 15 days since any form of nicotine entered my bloodstream at all.  So I thought I’d list a few statistics just for interest’s sake:

22 days =

£121 saved

440 Cigarettes not smoked

2,200 minutes of my life not wasted

3 weekends enjoyed

4 nights out (2 with smokers) enjoyed

More than one ‘quiet’ day at work passed without problem.

1 PMT week – no worse than before (thank goodness – could you imagine!?)

All in all it’s going really well – except for 2 things.  1 is a cough I’ve developed, so I guess that’s not really an exception to things going well – as much as a sign my lungs are clearing of some of the debris… but it’s rather annoying!  The second thing is my skin seems to have gone really bad – at the moment it’s reminiscent of a cobbled victorian street (except rather red!).  I thought that quitting smoking was supposed to do wonders for your skin – mine’s now even drier than it was!

Or maybe it’s just got to the stage where I’m falling apart!

Apart from the general feeling of well being, happiness, and clearer lungs (natch) it is nice to have something to ‘show’ for having quit smoking.

Even though it’s only been two weeks, I decided to treat myself to a watch that I’ve wanted for ages, and the absolutely great thing about it is, that it doesn’t even touch on what I’ve saved by not smoking for the last 2 weeks!  It’s quite something to think of things this way, and it’s not until I placed my most-fabulous watch on my wrist that I realised this – I’ve put off buying quite an expensive watch for 7 years – why? Because it’s expensive!  But, in the 7 years of yearning for this luxury expense (we’re talking religiously ogling at the website here) I’d spent £14,014.00 on cigarettes (ouch).  That works out at over 200 times the cost of the watch!

The great thing about it is, is that expenditures such as this will not break the bank. I don’t think that I’d be able to think of enough things within a month to buy that would equate to the £150+ a month I spent on fags (and yes, that even means pairs of shoes!) – so when I do treat myself, knowing that I still have money to spare is a fantastically good feeling!

My watch shall serve as a brilliant reminder of one of the reasons I quit smoking, and this particular reason (money) means that I feel like I’ve had a weight lifted off my shoulders.

Well, this blog post was originally going to be about how I managed to quit for 8 months a few years back, how I only used 4 patches and the rest of the time I just managed to stay quit because I was happy with it.  It was originally going to be about the fact that I had no withdrawal symptoms, and that I was able to hang around my friends at their house, and in pubs (when it was still legal to smoke inside) and clubs, and not be worried about the temptation to smoke, and how until recently I didn’t feel I could attempt to quit again because I didn’t feel ‘like I did back then.’

 This blog post however has (quite spontaneously) evolved into something different.  Having read a book last week, which I would highly recommend to anyone considering quitting smoking, or perhaps someone who has already and is using NRT (Nicotine Replacement Therapy) as I was, I have completely re-evaluated my ideas on quitting smoking.  The book – Allen Carr’s EasyWay to Stop Smoking, is a genuinely good read, written by someone who has completely quit smoking, and who smoked more than I did – a weirdly comforting thought, and with a 90% success rate, it’s worth doing.

 I’m not going in to details about the book itself, although as I said, it’s up there in my 10 books I’d recommend (another blog for another time) but it has changed the way I have perceived my non smoking, so much so that I’ve even chucked the patches.  I’ve searched on Twitter for the last few days under the criteria “quit smoking”, just to see if, like me, people have blogged on their efforts to quit, and also whether they’ve blogged on any specific methods (naturally discounting the ‘Try this and we’ll guarantee…. bollox’!) and below are the three predominant topics that seem to have come up:

 1/  Breaking habits

I read somewhere that someone had basically foregone his first cup of tea in the morning, all but ignored some of his friends (no explanation was given from what I could ascertain) because he knew them via smoking,  not having a coffee when he got to work… the list goes on.

This to me would be my idea of hell!!! Imagine going without the first cup of coffee in the morning, imagine not saying hello to your friends, not even to pop over and say “look guys, I’ve quit smoking, so won’t be hanging out with you today” – how long would you have to go before you felt it safe to go ‘back in the water’ and speak to them again, 1 week, a few months, never?

2/ Graphic imagery

Ok, so, how long have the government been forcing cigarette companies to put big labels with warnings such as “Smokers die a long and painful death” and graphic pictures of cancerous lungs, skin etc… on fag packets?  Too long!  All I know is that, yes, I smoked before this came in to effect, but I continued to smoke long after, and even started smoking again after a successful 8 months free, as mentioned above with those images and sentences still emblazoned on every packet… and basically, if it worked, no one would take up smoking now would they… I mean really… the pics are disgusting.

Nuff said.

 3/ Trying to quit.

This is the final thing I would like to point out, and am banning myself from using this phrase from now on, I have noticed this in peoples tweets, and blogs, and also in my own speech when people have asked me how things are going.  “I am trying to quit smoking” is, as far as I’m concerned at any rate, as bad as saying “I’m cutting down”.  This to me is like subconsciously giving myself an out from what I have decided to do, a cheat if you will, the ‘Sonic Screwdriver of Smoking’.  If I continue with “I’m trying” then I’m almost saying that there is a possibility I’ll slip-up and if I do then that’s ok, I can get away without feeling guilty and safe in the knowledge that I was, and still am “trying”.   This isn’t like dieting, food doesn’t kill you, slowly or otherwise, food isn’t something you grow accustomed to, you need it to survive, in terms of smoking I coin the phrase “Try not. Do, or do not.  There is no try”

 So I’ve come up with (so far anyway) the three commandments for not smoking:

 1/ Thou shalt not give up the things thou lovest!

2/ Thou shalt not ram verbal imagery down smokers throats(est)

3/ Thou shalt not try.  Thou shalt do, or do not.

 If you can think of any more, please let me know, and as always, comments welcome.

The Perpetual Quitter – Day 10 (no cigarettes), Day 3 (no nicotine), £55 saved.

My quit smoking schedule went way off track after a few days, and if I’m honest, there is absolutely no excuse for it.  This time, I’ve gone back to the patches.  I could never, during the first weeks of quitting, trust myself with the lozenges, and they weren’t brilliant.  A few of the downsides were:

1/ not being able to drink whilst sucking a lozenge – nothing to do with alcohol consumption, but anything at all! One of the most important tips I’ve heard of is to drink plenty of water when you’ve quit to alleviate some of the cravings.

2/ Not being able to eat – whilst snacking isn’t something I want to do, trying to time a half hour lozenge, which in reality took almost 2.5hours to dissolve, around breakfast, lunch and dinner, was not easy at all – especially when you’re supposed to be consuming 9 lozenges a day.

3/ The taste – to be honest, it wasn’t brilliant and also, everyone knows mint screws with the taste of virtually anything!

4/ Having to persuade yourself to take something, rather than just getting cigarettes.

Patches are pretty much hassle free. They allow you to do anything you’d normally do, don’t screw with your taste buds, and once they’re on, you don’t have to think about putting another one on every few hours.  There are a few downsides to them as well though – although I expect many of these will vary from person to person:

1/ They itch like crazy for the first 10-15 minutes of putting them on – uncomfortable but bearable!

2/ They also cause limb ache for the first half hour or so, which limb of course depends on where you put them.  It’s not an awful pain, more like a dull ache or muscle cramping.

3/ They leave “plaster marks” which take forever to remove! I have heard one tip however, that using nail polish remover the day after taking the patch off, can work wonders at removing the excess glue – I shall see how that one pans out.

So, as before, I’m feeling quite positive.  I put the patch yesterday afternoon, now I just have to make sure that I’m not tempted to buy any more cigarettes (easier said than done!) – luckily I managed to keep the patch on overnight and get to sleep ok, so that really helped avoid the craving first thing this morning, and seemed to stop me even considering getting a packet of cigs too.  Another help has been to favourite the website of my first ‘bribery purchase’, so I keep looking at the shoes whenever I want a reinforcement of why I’m doing this!

I’ve decided to structure a bribery routine.  Rather than just saying ‘I’ll treat myself’, I want to develop a scale of things to treat myself with – and to help myself with this I shall also be using the “Jar Method”.  The Jar Method will involve putting the money I don’t spend on cigarettes in, yes, you guessed it, a jar, and dipping in to that for the treats.

So far, my treat scale involves the following:

Week 1 – 1^st treat = SHOES!

Week 3 – 2^nd treat = WEEKEND AWAY

Month 6 – big treat = TATTOO

Month 12 = HOLIDAY

I’m trying to think of a few things to put in between, little treats so that I don’t get too overwhelmed with waiting a few months for the big ones, so If anyone has any ideas, feel free to leave a comment, or send me a tweet!

And just so you know, any support is much appreciated

Yours, The Perpetual Quitter.

I have lost count of the times I have tried, and failed, to quit this ridiculous habit of mine. I’ve not even figured out exactly why I do it. The thought of quitting scares the living daylights out of me – even though I’ve managed to stop for months at a time before now.

Anyone who knows me, will testify that I’m a chain smoker, and seemingly a perpetual quitter (hence the title of the first blog post on this subject) and I don’t know if it’s my apparent attitude, or the amount of times I’ve failed and returned to the infernal weed, but nobody (myself included) seems to believe that I can do this.

The question is… Can I?

As I sit here thinking about the packet of lozenges that I bought today in lieu of my usual nicotine delivery system, I wonder why I am worried, nervous, nauseated even, at the mere thought of having one of these things instead of a cigarette. In truth I really don’t know.

Maybe it’s the fact that I work in an office, 8 hours a day, without being able to see daylight unless I go outside.

Maybe it’s the fact that if I’m stressed, or bored, or unhappy, I have the ‘excuse’ just to take a five minute time out.

Maybe it’s because I’ve now been smoking for 10 years (I’m shocked at myself that it’s been so long)

Maybe I’m just making excuses.

Anyway, the point of this part of my blog is to air my feelings and discuss openly the problems and thoughts that invariably go through my mind when I quit, and hopefully, when it gets to a point that I recognise the signs that I may start again, try to fix it before I do.

I scanned back through my diary today and the last time I managed to quit I’d saved over £100 – clearly I’m not thinking straight if I prefer to go back to smoking, rather than enjoying the freedom not spending £140+ (makes me nauseous even thinking of that figure) a month on cigarettes. I must be crazy!

So – reasons why I smoke (in no particular order):

1/ Boredom

2/ Stress relief

3/ Fresh (don’t laugh – see above!) air

4/ Force of habit.

The habit of having a cigarette whilst I’m driving, after food, while having a drink (the seemingly endless list) is definitely my biggest problem, however none of the above constitutes a reason why I should continue to do it. So I’ve broken down a few quick figures below that I shall endeavour to keep in mind:

CASH-WISE

£5.30 (approx a day), £148.40 a month, £1929.20 a year

TIME-WISE

1 hour a day. 7 hours a week, 28 hours a month, 336 hours a year.

The cost of 72 lozenges – £7.

So, as I wedge the first lozenge to the side of my mouth (hoping that we’re either not too busy on the phones today, or that nobody on the other end can tell there’s something in my mouth) I feel good, and quite proud of myself. However I am wary of this feeling – I’ve been here before. My goal this time is not so much quitting, as ‘staying quit’ and, if I’m honest, I’m hoping it’s easier than it sounds.

Wish me luck!

Well it is now July.  Panto season, and the May play are now well and truly over, and Cubbington Players have now started on rehearsals for the October play.  Actually it would be more accurate to call them the October ‘Plays’, as this year, for something different, CP have decided to put on 2 one-act shorts instead of one standard length production.

There were a few reasons behind this decision, the main one of course being holidays (during rehearsals especially), so the concept of doing two shorter plays was introduced and seemed like the perfect solution.

 The two plays that were eventually picked fell together quite nicely.  Two productions meant two producers, and both had come to the initial readings bearing a play about, of all things, babysitting!  The theme was chosen!  After some excruciating readings – one involving myself reading the part of a mother to a ten month old child, the child in question being read for by my own father (yes, this caused me to have a few sleepless nights!) the two plays were finally agreed upon, and rehearsals have now begun in earnest.

In one of October’s plays, ‘Keep Calm’, I find myself playing my first adult ‘straight’ role (i.e one that doesn’t involve silly tights and custard pies) in my whole experience of theatre.  I have been on stage before, off and on as a child and teenager, but on a scale much larger than CP and in much smaller roles.  I suppose I should have been more nervous about the larger productions, but in a sense it was not as scary – yes, a large theatre meant a larger audience, but with the scale of productions there was also a larger cast, making it easier to ‘forget’ the stage fright.  On CP’s stage you can see the back of the hall, even with the stage lighting shining in your face, you can also make out the first one or two rows of people making the performance seem more personal, and of course more daunting.  In hindsight Panto was so much easier – at least you had a little bit of artistic license – especially when things went wrong!

 The role itself I find, is an incredibly challenging one as well (well, for me in my relatively small dramatic experience anyway).  I used the term ‘straight’ role loosely, both plays that are being done are comedies with a large element of farce between them, however the role that I’ve been given (a character reminiscent of a young Sybil Fawlty) is as normal as I’ve had so far!  The play is such that comedy timing, both verbally and physically, is crucial to get the most humour out of it.  I have to be able to quickly and confidently interrupt on cue whilst talking at my ‘husband’ (that shouldn’t be a problem!), the ability to remember my numerous to-ings and fro-ings (without falling over or banging into any of the furniture), and how many times, and at what point I am to kiss my ‘dearly beloved’ (I counted… it’s 7!).  Apart from all the nerves though, I’m very much looking forward to this production – a small role to flex my acting-muscles, and see if it’s possible for me to carry off a role that doesn’t involve custart pies or my negligible singing talent!

Methinks I should start learning my lines!

 ”Baaaazzziiiiiilllllllllllllllllllllllll”

“We Welcome you to Gladys Haulover’s retirement party”

Well, to be honest, I think that most of us know what we are going to expect when going to a murder mystery, Death (for starters), intrigue, and a certain amount of second guessing – I am happy to say that Cubbington Players first effort in this arena was no exception.
However, I have to say that there were a few surprises included that I admit I wasn’t expecting!

The theme of this evening was Gladys Haulover’s retirement party – and no, this wasn’t the only cringeworthy name that made an appearance that evening…  We walked in to the small village hall in Cubbington, greeted by balloons, banners, and all sorts of Bunting (I love that word).  No expense had been spared to make us feel like we really were part of the designated theme of that evening.  There were numerous tables dotted around, ready set up for the food that was also on offer, and although it was a tad cold we all sat down and merry chatter was soon heard throughout the room.

The cast itself was small in number, which we realised later on was a good thing, as by the end of the evening there had been numerous bottles of wine consumed.

First up – Gladys Haulover – the star of the evening, this gentle lady was retiring, and handing over the reigns of her company “Haulover the World” to her unnamed successor!
Next up – Phil O’Stein (told you the names got worse!) – Transport manager, and all round dodgy character, who was hoping to get the job!
Gaby Cowie – the HR representative – not too difficult to see that she also thought that she was up to the job – i took an instant dislike to this character which is testament to the person who played her as she is a lovely woman!
Brian Noser – The most odious man that you will ever meet, and rather a mis-placed sense of self-worth, thought he’d got Gladys’s job in the bag!
Leah Billity – Gladys’s PA, not the brightest button in the box (and the dress she was wearing was in rather stark contrast to this) she had only recently started working at the company.
Laurie Driver – *cringe* yes – you guessed it, the Lorry Driver!  Holds a torch for Leah, and had an interesting array of (Thankfully fake) tattoos to boot!

And of course, the very talented Inspector

The evening began smoothly, an introduction to Gladys’s intentions to leave the company, and an appreciation for us all attending her “do”.  She made her way around the room, introducing herself to us all, and treating us as if we were part of the staff.  This heightened the sense of audience participation to all who attended, and she, along with the other cast members kept in character even when we asked some very taxing questions.  It is at this point I should mention that a lot of the people there knew the cast personally, and although a lot of us unashamedley tried to trick them out of their “character” we were all unsuccessful!
Everyone was getting slightly hungry at this point, and were expecting the soup to be delivered any time soon when, SHOCK HORROR, the curtains on stage opened to show Gladys, DEAD at her table on the stage!  Although this was expected, I am sure that you can understand that we were all most perterbed by the murder occurring before the first course had even started!!!

The evening continued, and CP must have thought of everything!  Evidence was presented to all of the tables in the form of letters, tape recordings, and of course the murder weapons (including a bit of blood!). The attendees were invited to ask questions to all of the characters and I have to say that there were some really taxing ones posed, all of which were responded in character by all of the actors.  Some of the queries that had obviously not been considered during preperation for the evening, were answered in a timely fashion with excuses that were thought up on the spot with rarely a pause – this professional touch I believe is what makes Cubbington Players an am-dram company to be proud of.

Now, on a personal note, when my Dad told me he had a part in this (Phil O’Stein) I did automatically say that I would point the finger at him, no matter what occured during the evening, as the person who committed the crime.  But so well thought out was this story that all of the characters had the “Means, Motive and Opportunity” to carry out the first murder.  What stumped me was that they threw in a second, and that one of my prime candidates Brian Noser was shot dead!  I thought it most inconsiderate due to the fact that I had got it in my mind that he was the one who committed the murder of Gladys! 

To cut a long story short though, the night proceeded as a usual murder mystery would – with the addition of some gorgeously cooked chicken (provided by some local professional caterers) veg and potatoes, and followed by a luscious raspberry cheesecake… oh and some more wine of course!  At the end, we were then all invited to start gathering our thoughts, and point the finger at the person (or persons) “whodunnit!”  It took quite a bit of time for me to do this, whether it was the wine, or the characters involved, but finally I pinpointed my father, as promised, as I believed that he had the most reason to commit the murder. Unfortunately I decided that there was another person involved in the second murder, and lost points because of this (mental note – watch more CSI next time!!!)

Oh well, at least I got it half right!

One final little notation, is that Cubbington Players used no advertising for the above Murder Mystery.  With the uncanny use of “word of mouth” CP managed to have a full house on both evenings, and by all accounts (from both nights), gave all who attended an evening to remember.  It was a fantastic success, and due credit goes to the writers of this piece, who took part in this murder mystery evening as the Detective (Mark Frampton) and Brian Nozer (Dan Hawkins)

Lets hope that CP are up to the challenge of increasing Cubbington’s mortality rate again soon!  I just hope next time that I’m not the victim!

Just goes to show – it always pays to do your research before you go out!

Pulling up in Leamington last Wednesday – I had one thing on my mind… yes – you guessed it,
making good use of my Orange Wednesdays 2-4-1 offer at Pizza express (other mobile networks and pizza restaurants are available!) but was foiled by the lack of forethought.  My new fangled gadget (the spangly, all singing all dancing I-phone) was a wonderful tool when it came to finding the restaurant, but was sorely lacking in the ability to print out the voucher that I needed for the offer! (Why couldn’t it have been as simple as the 2-4-1 cinema tickets, that’s what I want to know!)

So, after an unsuccessful trip to Pizza Express, decided to try our hand at Strada, walking into the lovely restaurant (which was thankfully quite warm on such a cold evening) I felt quite excited but was unfortunately then greeted by the news of a wait that neither my friend’s stomach, nor mine, could possibly handle!

After still more searching, we came across Prezzo (still undecided on the exact pronunciation for that yet) a lovely looking Italian restaurant a bit out of the way in Leam, but decided to head inside (again greeted by fabulous warmth – even if the gentleman who greeted us wasn’t quite so friendly!) Again – we were told we would have to wait!
Busy – everywhere on a Wednesday?!!?  Is this a new trend, or is it that I am unaccustomed to dining out in the midlands after so many years!

After some discussion, it was decided that we would sit and wait here, as everywhere seemed to be jam-packed with people after sustenance – by the time we had found somewhere else to eat we’d have probably got served here!  How wrong I was!

After deciding what we wanted whilst we were sat down in what can only be described as snoozably comfortable leather sofas we were shown to our seats.  We had a wonderful view of what is quite a modern restaurant, but had somehow managed to retain some of the feel of an Italian restaurant (loved the pizza oven – modern technology covered by a mock-stone finish which looked quite tasteful).  We waited for what seemed like an age to get served, but finally we did, by
a very friendly woman and the man that she was training up as a waiter.  Friendly and helpful, she took our order and promptly disappeared. 

After another timely wait, the food finally arrived.  The starter (Mushroom Al Forno £4.75) was cooked to perfection!  The mushrooms had been covered with just the right amount of Garlic butter (which in some restaurants I have found can be smothered to death!) with a wonderful crumb and cheese filling, lettuce, and what can only be described as a pure stroke of genius with this dish – sour cream! 

For a main course I went for the Risotto Mediterraneo (£9.75) with Tiger Prawns, Petit Pois and a Saffron Sauce.  The dish itself was well cooked, though I found it a little plain (even with a hefty sprinkling of parmesan cheese) and the prawns were cooked to perfection – my only complaint about these being that there were far fewer of them than I’d have liked!

All in all though, it was a very nice evening.  Although the main course was a little bland, it had been cooked well, and the starter was definitely one to have again!  The modern air of the restaurant meant that we didn’t feel out of place as a couple of friends out for a meal, and there were plenty of groups of people able to chat happily and listen to the good selection of music – would highly recommend this as a restaurant for a nice meal out with friends or family.
Now – before I get any complaints about not commenting on what my companion had, and also lack of tweets during this venture, can I just say that the 3G signal went almost as soon as I entered the building – and on the behest of Tim (accusing me of being antisocial) I put my I-phone away in my bag (I do wonder if having a notepad would have been seen as being more acceptable!) and was unable to take notes!

PS – sorry this post is late!